anyways…

The discovery that our newborn baby Liam was cute was a shocker to us. You see, all the other four kids were cute…so we kinda thought that our cute baby days were done with. Not so. Liam is one cute kid. With a cute kid comes the unending ability to look like a zombie. That’s right…I’m tired. Liam is doing well…pee, poop, eat, sleep, cry (occasional smile). Keeps us up a bit, but overall it’s fine. My message this month is about poop.

Liam’s got this reputation, see. He just keeps pooping while you have the diaper off. You think he’s done so you dive in…but when the diaper’s off he starts perkolating. We’ve figured out how to keep the bed clean, the clothes clean, and yes - us clean (only after some mistakes…you think we’d get this right…he IS our 5th kid). Well last night he took it to a new level. I pulled the diaper off and cleaned up that little bottom, but right after I put the diaper under him and before I closed the diaper and was still lifting his bottom in the air to adjust the diaper, he had hippo poop. A nice stream literally shot 3 feet across the room from our bed. It soiled the bouncy seat on the floor next to the bed. Today, he did the same thing, just not so spectacular - 2 feet. I’m thinkin’ Olympics here.

I’ve been peed on, puked on, pooped on, coughed on and sneezed on in the past 4 days. If you think for one moment that you’re up to having kids…think again. On second thought…those eyes and smiles…those coos and giggles. Those hugs and kisses. Those first steps. The list goes on. Responsibly have children. Love them. Care for them. Let them have two parents, husband and wife, legally wedded. But for pete’s sake, wear proper protective gear when changing a poopy diaper.